Metanoia

I discovered this word in passing. I'm not actually sure how I came across it, but I remember thinking, "That's an interesting word. Wonder what it means." I took to Google to figure it out and the moment I was enlightened by the definition, the word hit me in a way that I wasn't expecting.

Metanoia
[meh-ta-noy-ah] - Greek
noun. The journey of changing one's mind, heart, self, way of life; spiritual conversion.

As I've grown and changed in this year alone, I'm steadily changing my mind, my way of life. I started viewing myself differently. The way I interacted with other people. The way I imagine my dreams and seeing seemingly impossible things as possible. Even how I’ve begun to interpret my spirituality and faith. I take more intuitive action and really let faith lead me along the way. I am present in experiencing this state of, what we now know as, metanoia.

I'm different. I'm not who I was yesterday and I probably won't be the same tomorrow. And that's okay. I'm wiser, more grounded, and intentional about being spiritually in tune. More focused on doing what's best for me, even if it's not what’s popular and respecting others for doing the same. In this season of changing my mind and being present, I've found that it is important to appreciate the little things. The first stretch in the morning. The way your feet feel when they hit the ground. The split seconds it takes to make a decision, which ultimately determine the paths you'll find. I have internalized this idea that it's best to be fluid in expectation of self and of the world because both are destined to surprise you.

I've accepted that, it's okay to change my mind. To decide that who I was yesterday, doesn't have to be the same person I am today. I'm allowed to have mood swings and new interests. I'm allowed to put me first and focus on pursuing my dreams. I don't have to consult the world for what I decide to. I give myself permission to journey as I please, because I was given life to live abundantly. So I shall.

Because... I can.

I’ve decided to speak my mind. To take up space and all the space I occupy.